The Rules of Fanhood

As I prepare to head out for a little Christmas Eve football viewing, I feel it is my duty to share the official Rules of Fanhood.  WARNING: If you are a Steelers fan you may want to stop reading now.

There are many levels of fanhood as it pertains to sports.  The casual fan who may own a single t-shirt and manage to watch a few games each season.  They might be able to tell you who 5 players are and maybe met one of them at Starbucks once or twice.  These folks don't plan their weekend around what time kickoff is or whether there is a home game or not.  On the other end of the spectrum is the FANatic.  A closet full of jerseys and a room full of autographs is the only way of life for these folks.  I live in the FANatic world myself.  I can make friends with anyone at the bar wearing my team's jersey and I can probably tell you who started at what position at any time in the team's history.  Is it slightly concerning and unhealthy? Probably.  But it is a good life.

Here is where we cross into the world of FANatics who go above and beyond though.  Enter the Steelers fan who cannot watch the game at the bar without their 'Terrible Towel".  You are waving a towel at the television in a bar dude.....think about that.  Is Big Ben gonna throw an interception of you fail to remember your towel?  There is also the classic FANatic who is still wearing the worn out and tattered jersey of a player who has long since retired.  This is not a throwback, this is a piece of crap that has been washed 9,000 times and is almost recognizable.  We see you Chris Weinke jersey guy, and we are judging you.  The hat that has so much funk on it that people smell you before they see you is just not cool.  Buy a new one, I'll pay.  To the random "hey guys, let's do our chant" crowd at the bar- NO. This can only be done if you are at an alumni gathering of some kind and everyone there is cheering for the same team.  Random 5 person "TAR" "HEEL" chants are not cool. 

The only thing worse than the above mentioned overkill FANatics are the poser fans.  The guy who has no idea what the hell he is watching but wants to make small talk.  Stats? Roster?  Team history?  Rules of the sport? NOT A CLUE.  But they bought a sweet jersey on eBay to try and pick up girls at the bar so now I am subjected to this moron trying to trash talk when he obviously has never watched a sporting event in his life.  FLAG ON THE PLAY - Illegal use of douche-baggery - Round of shots penalty.

So remember as you head out during Bowl Season, the playoffs, March Madness, MLB Opening Day....etc. that you must observe the Rules of Fanhood.  Throw on that jersey and hat, leave the towel at home, google some rules and history so you don't sound like a jackass.  
MOST IMPORTANTLY........Do not be the guy at a Panthers v. Falcons game wearing your Green Bay jersey.  If your team is not playing then you should not be wearing that jersey at an event.  You look like a moron and people are making fun of you.

Let's give this a shot.....

After reading some of the blogs my friends have created over the past year or so, I have been inspired to begin one myself.  I cannot promise that this will always be the most politically correct and "safe for work" blog you will ever read.  I also cannot promise that it will always be the humorous rantings that many of you have come to expect from me via facebook.  Put simply, we are gonna see where this thing takes up.  Feel free to comment, provide feedback, agree, disagree, debate....etc.

So here we go..........I will start off my giving the update on where my life currently is and the big things that are on deck for me.  As most of you know, I am currently expecting my first child in April of 2012.  To say that is a bit of a reality check is the understatement of the century.  Suddenly the guy who many regard as a big kid is actually going to be responsible for a child of their own.  The reality of that responsibility is enough to stop you in your tracks when it sets in.  I do consider myself very lucky though given that I have the financial means and support system to be ready to raise a child.  The examples of great parenting I have seen from my parents and many friends have been educational in how I expect that I will react when my time comes with my little man.  God help me if this kid is more like me than his mom though.  Our spare bedroom, once known as "The Watson Suite", currently resembles a bomb shelter in Fallujah.  The history on my computer is now loaded with babiesrus.com and buybuybaby.com links.  Superbowl party plans are now taking a back seat to baby shower plans.  All in all, this is the most exciting period of my life I have experienced.  Every day seems to bring a new reality that my world is about to be very, very different.  I am finally at a point in my life where I actually welcome that change.